Category Archives: Dating

Buy a Fondue Pot and Win at Life

fondueMuch like stirring in a figure eight is the secret to keeping cheese melted in a fondue pot, the fondue pot itself is the secret to making life awesome.

There’s something that brings out the child in you when you fondue, and that feeling is something too many of us let slip away. This is why I am here to tell each and every one of you to go and buy a fondue pot right now.

The fondue pot has many purposes, keeping you slim, happy and entertained, but first, the fondue pot I use – the Trudaeu 3-in-1 Cheese Fondue pot – a slick medium-sized red ceramic pot on a wire stand, and it’s heated up by gel lighter fluid.

There are a few different fondue pots out there fyi – cheese, hot oil or hot wine and chocolate – but my favorite by far is doing cheese fondue. There are just so many more healthy options when you use a cheese fondue pot. You can dip any kind of vegetable, fruits, breads, meat, oh my.

You can make it incredibly low-cal too, and as a wheelchair-user this is always a good thing. What’s great about fondue to help you lose weight as well – it’s paces you, making it impossible to overeat since you have to rely on tiny forks for all of your eating.

This can be annoying, but the struggle can pay off. A lot of clever dieters will actually use smaller plates to not eat as much, and small fondue forks work just the same. After you secure a cheese fondue pot in your life, your next goal is to practice using it.

My fondue pot requires a gel-filled lighter fluid package to pop into the flame area so it can be lit. They also sell fondue pots that actually plug-in, but I love the live-flame so I have never gone the electric route. I do not trust myself to light my fondue pot however, so I always make sure I fondue when I have people over.

This brings me to my next point of why the fondue pot is so awesome – it just makes you happy, kind of like that Pharrell song. Stupidly happy even, which by default makes it a great entertaining food, especially if you have the right dippers. Summer sausage, French baguette, green apple, steamed red potatoes, brussel sprouts and carrots, and that is just my first round.

It’s also a super romantic way to eat. I made this for a new guy I’m dating and it was super fun. We cooked and ate together; mega-bonding ensued. Yup, the fondue pot can even help in the love department.

Fondue also forces you to eat non-processed foods, and that is where it may win the biggest. It’s easy setting up all the foods you need for a fondue feast, and they are all whole foods – no cooking required. Just buy them and set them on the table. It’s easy as that, and so good for you.

And if you’ve never done a cheese fondue before, here are my pointers: Always use two different cheeses (a Gruyere and a cheddar or swiss is best), start it on the stove first and then put the cheese in your fondue pot, always use flour or cornstarch to help melt the cheese and last, make sure to add an acid (some white wine or lemon juice) to help your cheese blend smoothly.

It may seem like a lot of work, but believe me cheese fondue is more than worth it. I think more than anything fondue puts a smile on my face. In a life where a disability can really bring on some difficult days, a silly little thing like this can have a surprisingly powerful effect on me, and I’m so glad – flameage and all – I discovered how influential it can be.

Do you fondue?

Products Mentioned

– Trudeau Cheese Fondue Pot

Escaping the Wrong Relationship

I’ve been writing for dozens of disability websites for around 15 years, and giving relationship advice has been when of my fortes. I’ve always prided myself on giving people the tough advice no one wants to hear. When you’re disabled like me the tough advice is the most important.

I only bring this up because I’ve been terrible lately at taking any of the advice I have given. I think every girl out there is guilty of doing this – we like to tell everybody what they should do, but we struggle at taking the tough advice ourselves.  When you’re actually in the thick of it – it’s a lot harder to do the right thing.

This is especially the case when we find someone we really really like; the type you’d see a future with. The love that’s there can be strong, but we overlook several things about their personality in the process. I’m embarrassed to say that I’ve done this several times. Being a girl can really be annoying sometimes; and I blame these poor decisions wholly on my extra emotions and hormones.

So…what ends up happening is that we fail to end a relationship that needs to end.  Many of us with disabilities are afraid of being alone.  When I was younger, this was something I worried about a lot. I really believed there wouldn’t be that many people out there who would be ok with my paralysis. As it turned out however, there are a lot more people than I thought (oh how I love it when I’m wrong).

Another fear a lot of us hold onto is worrying about no longer having your significant other there to help. When you’re in a long-term committed relationship and you have a disability, chances are your partner will do certain things for you and you might have come to rely on it. A lot of fear can lurk behind losing your independence in a breakup.

But we’re just like everybody else when it comes down to it. When the love isn’t reciprocated both ways it can break your heart, but still…many of us don’t want to fully sever ties. We can be hopeless romantics and hold out hope that things might turn around. At least that’s how I feel that things.Many of us with disabilities are pretty romantic people.  Saying goodbye for good is one of the hardest things to do.

But when the break-up finally happens, a huge relief occurs and your future again looks bright.Maybe you don’t see the brightness right away and all you see is an unending line of mediocre dates, but there is brightness there (you just don’t see it yet). Ending anything you still find some joy from is never easy.  You really have to put on your grown-up pants and just do it.

You should also indulge in your favorite break-up activities.  I myself have a handful of go-to items when a break-up occurs: 1) My favorite chick-flick movies and TV shows, courtesy of my favorite website Netflix (anything that’s a period piece is currently in my queue). 2) Video games, especially RPG ones, courtesy of the online gaming community/network and store, Steam (you gotta love being able to get games for your computer without leaving your house). And 3) Foods that make me happy. This typically involve ordering pizza; Papa John’s with garlic sauce is where it’s at, as well as lots of baked goods (lots), and a nectarine thrown in for good measure so I don’t feel guilty.

Communication and relationships are without question the hardest thing about being human. We’re constantly learning lessons, growing as people and ending relationships is one of the biggest of them to learn. I wish all of you the strength to be able to do this one day.

And when you find that strength, have your break-up kit ready to go. You’ll do fine I promise. I always see the light after every break-up.  It’s hard, but when you see it, it’s the most beautiful light you’ve ever seen.

How have you ended an unhealthy relationship?

Break-up Kit Musts

– Netflix

– OrderPapa John’s online (love this)

– Steam game network

 

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